Get over yourself, already

One thing about being a romance writer always, always amuses me – the looks on people’s faces when they ask me what I do, and get that answer in response. Usually it’s a combination of “Shut up, you do not!” and “Really? That’s so cool!”. Then they want to know exactly what I write, where they can find my work, and how much money I make doing it.

Which is none of their business, but that hardly stops them from asking. (Hell, if I only asked about the stuff that is actually my business to know, I’d be known as “that quiet girl, Hannah”, instead of “that nosy bitch”).

Of all those questions, I find the “where can I buy your book?” is often the most difficult to answer. Not that I don’t know where to find my own books, I mean difficult in the “golly, do I want this person to read my work?” sense. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to have people express an interest in buying my work (yes, buy my books, I need the money!). And normally, I whip out a pen and write down all the titles and were exactly they can be found (I really need to have more business cards printed up). But when my boss at my day job – a lovely woman, but somewhat conservative – asks me where she can find my books? You know, the ones with the bondage and the handcuffs and the sex toys and the anal sex? Frankly, that’s a little awkward making!

Which really, I have to get over. I’m a writer, after all, and there’s no reason I shouldn’t tell people that. I’m proud of my work, and I should be willing to express that as well And there’s no reason to think I have to shield consenting adults from reading anything, whether I’ve written it or not. Though of course I’m not trying to shield them, I’m trying to shield me – from feeling awkward or uncomfortable or whatever one would feel when a boss or co-worker gets a glimpse of just what goes on in my mind.

But that’s limiting, you know? And since I’m trying to put myself out there more, it really doesn’t make sense not to tell a reader where they can find my stuff. Especially if they’re specifically asking for it! Of course, I can always tell them that my work is fairly explicit – a small warning of this kind is really just polite, I believe (I really don’t want someone to pick up “A Toy Story” expecting something with a talking cowboy doll) – and then they can make up their own mind about whether or not to give it a go.

So I’m just going to get over myself. Or more accurately, pretend I’ve gotten over myself. I’m sure I’ll still feel awkward and a little uncomfortable at the thought of my boss reading the sex on the dresser scene in “The Devil and Ms. Johnson”, or the handcuff scene in "Jane and the Sneaky Dom", but whatever. After all, I got over my mother reading those books, and if I can get over that? I can get over anything.